The man whose death reconciles a family.

I recently officiated a memorial service of a 24 year old man, who died while taking a shower before going to his college classes.
The abruptness of his passing, of course, devastated his family. That same morning, I walked into the ER where his family was, and saw a family filled with shock and dismay. Upon entering into that room, I felt as though I was entering into a battle-zone of sorts. The cries and wailing wer rather overwhelming. There were several male social services and security staff in the hallway trying so desperately to comfort the family- to very little avail. As there were several female family members in need of comforting and emotional care, I quickly called upon the support of my wife and several female staff from our church.
There was so much distress and misery being experienced by the family; it really is difficult to explain. Their immediate loss was intense. The family and close friends had no opportunity to prepare for the loss, say good bye, or settle any unfinished issues. This sudden loss struck this family as they were preparing for their day, getting ready for work, school, or any other everyday events- none of them had death on their mind. None of us ever do. Their responses- shock, anger, guilt, sudden depression, despair and hopelessness- were all being experienced on some level by all of those suffering loss. This sudden tragic event shattered their sense of order and thrust them into a world forever changed. One question that was repeatedly being asked was, “Why?”.
What an incredibly unanswerable question. The question, “Why?” is often never answered, at least not in the ways we would expect them to be answered. Several days later the question was perhaps answered, revealed.
This young man’s memorial service began as many do- the obituary, scripture, a song, and a time of testimonial sharing from the audience. As members of the audience came to the podium, a letter was read by the young man’s mother. The letter was from his older brother who was unable to attend the memorial service. In the seven(7) pages of his letter, he masterfully unfolded God’s plan of Salvation for the world, and encouraged all in attendance to listen to what God was saying to them, and how eternally important trusting in Christ as savior is. It was during this time of sharing that I lost control of the meeting. With this man’s lifeless body in front of them, one family member after another began to unravel the question of “Why”. It was not so much revealed in what they said, as much as it was the fact that they were speaking, period. The family, mom’s side-dad’s side, had been separated by over 20 years of despising the other. The non-verbal communication had spoken volumes during these decades, and the rift was wide. The “speaking” broke the silence. Amongst the tears and pain, those things that had separated this family, had begun two wash away.
I stood behind those speaking from the podium, posed in support, and attempting to maintain some sort of decorum in the room, as the Spirit of God had released His power in the form of grace and healing. As I stood behind those family and friends at the podium, I shifted my attention to the body of the young man as he lay in the casket. An overwhelming sense of understanding had been released by God to me at that same moment.
What I began to sense was this: That perhaps the “Why?” to his unforeseen and unexpected death had behind it, a two-fold purpose. First the letter from the brother; it shared directly through the lips of a loved one and friend to all in attendance the plan of redemption and salvation, through faith in Jesus Christ. Second, was the issue of reconciliation. As this man lay lifeless, he was bringing new life into his family. Throughout his life at first as a child, and then as a teen and in his last state as a man in his twenties, he must have hoped , perhaps even tried to bring his parents and both their families together. Well, now it was happening, and right in front of him.
The Bible shares these words in 2 Corinthians 5:18-21 –ESV -All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.
Did you catch that one line ( I underlined it for us)? ”He gave us the ministry of reconciliation. “. As this man lay dead, he brought reconciliation to his family. What an incredible way to hear God answer our cries. This man’s death brought reconciliation to his family. We may not be so fortunate- we need to be reconciled with all our family and friends now.